In Short –  Issue 2 (Winter 2025)

January 31, 2025

Image credit: Frances Gonzales

Dandruff

By Michelle R. Brady

I started when you were maybe one, when the other kids started walking and they’d leave the moms to play alone or run around. The other mothers started talking about things I didn’t know, like what kind of shoes were most like bare feet and what signs their kids knew. Then I’d lean over you and ruffle your black hair, watching the dandruff fly off, feeling each speck a sort of accomplishment. It seemed better than to pretend to be part of their conversation. Sometimes, I carried you over to be with the other kids, but they’d be up and moving within minutes, so I’d have to go back and move you to them. And they’d stare at us like they already knew we were out of place in the play area. Me: too large. You: too immobile.

The other moms were relieved when I did this. This was their one chance to commiserate, and I was a barrier to that. I mean, I know this is nothing compared to what you deal with, but… I don’t want to sound ungrateful; I know how lucky I am… All the extra effort to release their exasperation. The weight of pretending to be grateful when they were exhausted. The desire to discuss their problems and share solutions. You can make formula from goats’ milk, you know. I’ll send you the recipe. 

To me, these would have been joys. Jamie ran so fast that she hit the table and broke my favorite coffee mug. Mark’s babbling is driving me nuts; he’s so loud! So, I carried you to watch the kids run and babble and ruffled your hair like it was important work and waited to move you when they got bored. I watched the dandruff fly and reminded myself how lucky I was that you were there with me. 

That I wasn’t alone.

Michelle R. Brady (she/her) is a writer, editor, and attorney. Her fiction is included in The Forge Literary Magazine, Arts & Letters, Lunch Ticket, Fractured Lit, and others. She has been awarded a Gold Circle Award for fiction from the Columbia University SPA and is currently nominated for two 2025 Pushcart Prizes. She holds a BFA in fiction writing and is EIC of House of Arcanum. Find her at www.MichelleReneeBrady.com